Hall of Fame baseball player Satchel Paige famously had his "Six Rules for Staying Young." (The most memorable: Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you. ) Well, I'm turning 40 next month, and as midlife wraps (squeezes?) her loving arms around me, I feel the least I can do is share my own nuggets of wisdom for those on either side of the Great Four-Decade Divide.
These rules, mind you, are not made to be broken.
- Smile when you say hello.
- Never kick a sand castle.
- Always have a frisbee in the trunk of your car.
- There are three gifts a parent must give a child: love, confidence, and an education. Yes, these are gifts.
- Read the prescription label. And ask questions.
- However you measure wealth, multiply it by pi and you have the value of your child's smile.
- The most important skill in business: listening. The most neglected skill in business: listening.
- The most exciting play in sports: a bases-loaded triple.
- When there are no words, don't force them. Just be there.
- Pay attention to your tires and brakes. And remember these words: "Just an oil change, please."
- Save room for dessert. And share dessert with someone you love.
- The person you want to be with on your saddest day... that's the person you marry.
- A locker partner is a friend for life.
- Never leave the room on a punt return. Most plays in football can be seen one week after the next. A punt return taken to paydirt... that's a gem.
- Tolerance is a virtue. Next time you're really angry in line, take a breath. And try this: consider places you'd rather not be.
- When in doubt, Led Zeppelin.
- Never make fun of another man. (Thanks, Granddad.)
- Two keys to a long life: don't smoke and wear your seatbelt.
- Tell her she's beautiful.
- Invest money when you feel like you can't afford to. (Thanks, Dad.)
- If car keys are in your pocket, stop at two beers. Soda makes a good chaser.
- A bad movie is lost reading time that can't be recovered.
- Finish the job on time.
- Worrying doesn't change yesterday or help tomorrow. It only ruins today.
- Hold hands at the altar.
- Don't be afraid of Monday. Saturday's on the way.
- Eulogize your parents. No one knew them better.
- Be nice to the receptionist.
- The words own and owe : one letter, BIG difference.
- Fatherhood is easy. Parenting is hard .
- Expect the best. Be prepared for the worst.
- A hug is worth a week of "I'm sorry."
- A foot massage is worth a month of "I'm sorry."
- There are times we need to believe in something larger than ourselves.
- The world is a big place. See as much of it as you can.
- As painful as it is, death does not end a relationship. Shared memories are a slice of immortality.
- The secret to a happy family: two bathrooms.
- DiMaggio's hitting streak will never be surpassed. Don't waste your time with the debate.
- No one should challenge you more than you challenge yourself.
- Smile when you say goodbye. However hard it may be.
