photograph by nancy anderson / dreamstime
The year just passed — the one that shall not be named — is being widely jeered.
I, for one, will not dwell on the manifest horrors and outrages we’ve collectively endured since we all have our personal stories that run the gamut from inconveniences to tragedies.
Enough, I say.
It is the beginning of a shiny New Year when one envisions the old cartoons showing the departing year as a geezer brandishing a scythe and hourglass, and the incoming year as a happy diapered newborn. Of course, this is incorrect these days. A more fitting depiction would have the New Year as a surly teenager grabbing the scythe from the decrepit graybeard. We’re not making the freshest start into 2021.
But at least there is a sense that we are making progress toward some variant of normal. One thing many of us are looking forward to is tradition and ritual, having been denied so much in recent months and years. And the first practice many of us will pursue with heartfelt passion is the invoking of New Year’s resolutions. Even, I suspect, those souls who, every year, proclaim that such resolutions are wishful nonsense. “Do or do not,” says Yoda. “There is no try.”
Yes, it’s true that most get broken as quickly as a child’s toy on Christmas afternoon, but let us stay for the moment with intent. We make these resolutions with the purest of heart because, even if we’re fooling ourselves, it’s generally therapeutic. Thinking of dieting doesn’t reduce your weight, but it puts you in the right frame of mind.
So we’ll see many of the usual assertions, like “I will exercise more.” Or “I’ll be more patient.” Or “I’ll quit lying to myself.” (You know who you are.) But this year, people will be motivated to enact resolutions that go far beyond the usual ones. Here are a few to ponder.
I imagine, for instance, that many parents are anticipating that their children will soon be spending a good part of the day (K-12) or year (higher education) getting proper instruction and socialization. So mom and dad will resolve to take every chance to sleep, perchance to dream. Or even just an occasional nap.
It is my fervent hope that Shelby County Schools will resolve to redouble their efforts to make online learning smooth unto seamless. Even if students are back in classes, the online experience will still be around, so don’t stay stuck on clunky 1.0.
I predict many people will resolve to be less stupid. This is commendable although I suspect the worst offenders are the least likely to take the pledge.
You can bet that a lot of people will resolve to do less Zooming. It won’t be easy. They may not have a choice since many businesses have found that working from home is a money-saver. And users will confess that there are advantages to sweatpants over pantyhose. But for all the convenience, it’s a lousy way to communicate. How many times have two or three people started to say something at the same time? Gibberish ensues.
And these virtual exchanges encourage bad habits. Like when you’re feeling less than well-groomed and you go through the meeting with the video turned off, claiming that your computer is telling you the internet connection is “unstable.” Resolve to take a minute and run a comb through your hair. And, of course, as a recent nationally recognized journalist found out, resolve to keep your pants on.
I predict many people will resolve to be less stupid. This is commendable although I suspect the worst offenders are the least likely to take the pledge. But if you feel compelled to put this on your list of changes, let me suggest a variant: “I shall think before speaking.” This may seem obvious, since the principle is taught in elementary school, Sunday school, and Shakespeare. And it is often ignored by politicians, unmasked people, and poor souls who suddenly find themselves on local TV news. We can learn from them.
It is a challenge, since most of us feel compelled to blurt out our feelings. A certain potty-mouth Memphis City Council member comes to mind. But feelings are tricky — it’s OK to have them, but take care whom you share them with.
Having thought it through, I am pretty sure that most of us will generally resolve, when the time is right (but not before!), to hug a lot, dine without a care at restaurants, go to concerts, take in live performances of all kinds, and burn our masks.
Those will be welcome. But just in case you might need help keeping resolutions, ask Dr. Google about cognitive neuroscience, brain chemistry, and people who rely on problem-centric thought. Nobody said keeping resolutions would be easy. But veterans of the year that shall not be named are accustomed to challenges.
