photograph by UNOPIX / DREAMSTIME
After two years of rescheduling and postponing wedding dates, 2022 is set to be the year of weddings, although no one can truly predict how the pandemic will shape this year. But as Covid dashed wedding plans and expectations during the last two years, it also highlighted, as cheesy as it sounds, what really matters — the love and commitment between two individuals. Their ideal wedding might not have happened on the ideal date, at the ideal venue, with the ideal number of guests, but their commitment persisted. They might have postponed or held a small outdoor gathering or simply logged onto Zoom with an officiant. Now, as we look forward to a year calmer than 2020 and 2021, we are left wondering: What will weddings be like in a world shaped by the pandemic and its aftermath?
PHOTOGRAPH by mary kate steele photography
Sheril Greenstein of Shindigs by Sheril puts passion behind eachof the weddings she plans and executes.
We reached out to event planner Sheril Greenstein of Shindigs by Sheril to get her take, and what we realized in doing so is that weddings, as we know, are always shifting in expectations and traditions. Within the past decade, social media has helped the bride and groom share new wedding ideas and educated us about certain wedding traditions or venues. We’ve seen weddings get more expensive, more personalized. We’ve also seen couples marrying later in life, venturing away from traditional church weddings, writing their own vows, and so much more. Here’s what we learned.
How long have you been a wedding planner? What got you into the job and what keeps you staying with it?
I have been a wedding and special events planner for almost 20 years. I have always been artistic and incredibly organized and voluntarily coordinated every type of gathering for friends and family, but it wasn’t until a friend reached out about planning his wedding that I took it seriously. I’ve never looked back since. I love the creative challenge as well as the opportunity to meet and truly get to know so many incredible brides and grooms and their families during the planning process. Every event is unique to that client, and that is what makes each event so special. No cookie-cutter weddings. The relationships I make with each client are what makes what I do not just a job but a passion.
photograph BY PETR POHUDKA / DREAMSTIME
The pandemic has pushed couples to incorporate measures that prioritize health and safety, such as giving guests personalized masks and hand sanitizer as favors.
Do you think the concept of the “perfect” wedding day has changed?
My job is to make a bride’s vision come to life — however that might look and whatever that might take. Whether their preference is classic, contemporary, or completely unique, we consider every element and logistical detail to make it possible. The “perfect” wedding day, in my opinion, is about setting expectations and executing them in a way that leaves my couples completely at ease! There is nothing I won’t do for my clients. Whatever it takes to get it done. In the world of Instagram we see weddings that are over the top and not realistic for most. You don’t have to have it all — no one rarely does. It is about what elements are the most important to you to make it special.
Because of the pandemic, many couples have pivoted to smaller weddings — sometimes just a couple and their officiant on Zoom. Do you see weddings continuing on this track of smaller weddings?
I have planned every style and size throughout this pandemic. In some cases, we’ve had to change their wedding date four different times, impacting venues and vendor and guest counts! While wedding party sizes are growing again, many are taking precautions that make them feel most comfortable. Many still prefer outside venues, small individual-plated stations versus serve-yourself buffets, as well as personalized hand sanitizers and masks. Now with vaccines and boosters, there is a sense of comfort to being able to gather again. However, no matter the number of attendees, I think we’ve all embraced that it’s less about the crowd and more about the significance of the milestone.
What types of venues have couples been favoring recently? What do you see going ahead?
Many are preferring an option with outdoor patios or lawns. Memphis has so many venues in this category from The Dixon and Memphis Botanic Garden to Loflin Yard, Wiseacre, and Old Dominick Distillery. We just have to keep in mind a weather plan — rain, extreme heat, or extreme cold may pop up at any time in the Mid-South, so planning ahead makes the difference. People are ready to celebrate again! We used to be able to plan on 20 percent of invited guests to respond with regrets, but now we are seeing closer to only 10 percent “no’s.”
It seems like the time between the proposal and the wedding ceremony has stretched out over the years (with longer engagements to plan weddings). Does that assumption line up with your experience? How do you see the current state of affairs playing a role in a couple’s “planning timeline”?
Planning timelines have been elongated out of our control due to Covid restrictions, but I do my best to help these couples embrace the wait. Otherwise, the average remains about 12-16 months for wedding planning. I love getting the call as soon as the proposal takes place, but I can work within any timeline to secure vendors and details. The current state of Covid requires us to be ready to push, rush, or reevaluate at any point. Being flexible is most important, but we can make it happen! The industry is coming back with a vengeance. I am finding newly engaged couples who need to wait just to find a date open for the vendors they want.
How have the actual wedding dates changed, if at all? I read that there’s been a rise in weekday ceremonies and a rise in small ceremonies on one day and a large reception on another — has that been the case in your experience?
During Covid, we’re seeing couples who held intimate, Zoom-only ceremonies in 2020 and a one-year anniversary party blowout; we’re also seeing Friday and Sunday weddings continue to grow due to venue calendars being more constricted with the volume of 2020 and 2021 postponements.
photograph courtesy kelly ginn photography
Ring bearers and the pup of Suzanne Hanover and Joshua Zide.
Over the years, have any traditions gone out of style? Are there any that you are sad to see go? Any that you’re glad are gone? What new traditions (if any) have emerged?
I do love the artistry of an extravagant wedding cake, but I have also been working with brides and grooms who prefer different desserts and sweets over cake, such as Gibson’s Donuts or custom cookies. We also see many dogs/pets participating in the ceremony versus traditional flower girls or ring bearers. The creativity, however, is endless! Many of my brides are forgoing the bouquet and garter throw. Why stop the party? Wedding photo booths are growing. I love the black-and-white glam booth for a formal black-tie wedding. Everyone wants photo ops!
How has the rise of social media and the plethora of wedding information/inspiration online impacted the landscape of weddings?
Social media has completely changed the game — in a good way, I think. I love getting late-night texts or Instagram messages from my brides with links to flower inspirations or an invitation style they prefer. Yes, the plethora of options can be overwhelming, but it is my job to help the couple narrow down and make decisions that make the most sense for them, their venue, and styles.
How has wedding attire for guests changed over the years? What about decorations? What about food?
The wedding attire is absolutely dependent upon the couple’s wishes and vibe they want to create, whether a black-tie ballroom scene or outdoor barn-style celebration. Many choose a black-tie or cocktail attire wedding but a fun casual rehearsal dinner and/or “post toast.” A Memphis barbecue theme is always a favorite for out-of-town guests. Creative food trends we continue to implement include late-night snack surprises and Covid-safe single-serving bites (versus shared buffets).
After 20 months of extreme loss and uncertainty, how have people been able to include loved ones who have passed on or can’t make the wedding?
For loved ones who cannot travel, the virtual option has allowed those to celebrate and witness the ceremonies from afar. For those who are no longer with us, I love working with the families to pay tribute. We have included names in the programs, displayed or utilized heirlooms in the ceremony, created a gallery wall of portraits in the reception space, and even found creative ways to tie jewelry and/or mini-portraits into the bride’s bouquet or look. I recently worked with one groom who lost his mom, so he is dancing with his sister to a song that reminds them of her. Every detail of a wedding should be a personal experience for the couple.
In your experience, have there been any non-traditional ways people have incorporated their passions or their personalities in their weddings? Do you have any suggestions for couples who want to make their weddings feel personal?
I always encourage my brides to find ways to weave in their passions. It used to be that the most personal part of the wedding was the groom’s cake, displaying his hobbies or favorite sports teams. Now, from the food choices to their pets as well as their specialty cocktails, we want to make sure this wedding is all about the couple.
PHOTOGRAPH by christen jones photography
Pets are the newest, and perhaps most welcome, addition to the traditional wedding party. Some of them even dress for the occasion, as this one — named Brew — did for the wedding of Lynsay Pannell and Jason Bagdigian.
It seems that more couples are highlighting sustainability in their wedding. Do you see that here in Memphis?
In Memphis, we have a wonderful organization called 901Pop. We schedule them to arrive at the end of the night to repurpose all of the leftover flower arrangements that otherwise end up in the trash. They place them in vases and deliver them to retirement homes and hospitals with a note from the bride and groom.
What’s your number-one best piece of advice for couples planning their wedding?
This has always been my belief: Remember that this wedding is not about the weather or the flowers or the food; it is about why you are here. You are marrying the person you plan to spend the rest of your life with, build a family with, and love and respect! Everything else is just the icing on the cake!
